The person you hate the most, yourself

People don't understand why am I upset all the time.
People don't understand when I complaint and all... they said that I complaint too much. I think too highly of myself. I look down on people. I am judgmental.

What they don't know is, I am most critical to myself.
I am always upset with myself more than others.
I am most critical to me.
I can't forgive me.
I hate myself.

I hate myself.

That's the truth.
More than anyone else,
more than everything else.

So, when I can't do what I want to do,
when I can't achieve what I plan to achieve,
I hate myself most.

Of course people will see that I criticize, that I complaint...
but the truth is, I am trying to approve myself.
I tried day and night
Everyday.
Everytime.
Cry?
Done that. Too much.
I still can't accept my failure.
Over and over again.
It's so frustrating, and really affect my self-esteem.

So, if there's anybody I am hard on, it was me
If there's anybody I am critical on? It was me too.
When I said I hate people, I hate myself the most.
More than anybody else.

9-Nov-2018; 14:43
Klang,